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Pop of Gold! A Girl’s Room Makeover!

Portrait by Sean Gin Photographs by Tessa Neustadt courtesy Homepolish Dear You Guys, I’ve done it! I’ve written another guest post for my secretwife Emily Henderson. In it, I describe the harrowing transformation of one little girl’s bedroom from terrorizing to terrific and tell the earth-shattering story of one kitten who saved a family from doom and damnation. CHECK OUT THESE PREVIEW PICS YO: Check out the full story on Style by Emily Henderson! But hurry, a small kitten’s life depends on you! Love, Orlando CLICK HERE FOR FULL STORY>>> PS: But wait! There’s more! Check out even more photos…

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Pottery by P. Lyn Middleton

Photographs by P Lyn Middleton & Orlando Soria Dear Travel Diary, It’s been a whirlwind year so far, which has left little time for writing (sorry!) but I had a magical discovery over the weekend that I just can’t keep to myself. I went to Ojai with my boyfriend and some of his homies and one of the first shops we wandered into was the wonderful studio of P Lyn Middleton, a ceramicist who makes the most amazing avant pottery and runs P Space Pottery on Ojai Avenue. Growing up, my best friend’s mother was a potter who made (and makes)…

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A Fizzy Glamourdrink to Ring in The New Year!

Photographs by Daniel Collopy Dear New Years Resolvers, I have to admit it, I’m not a huge New Years fan. I don’t know if it’s the reminder that another year has passed, that super depressing Auld Lang Syne song that makes me want to shove wrapping paper in my ears whilst sobbing, or just the fact that I’m usually over the holidays by the time it happens. Whatever the reason, New Years has never been my favorite. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t totally hate it. But if I was on the Titanic with New Years and all the other holidays,…

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Creating A Glamourbedroom for The Zoe Report

Photographs by Tessa Neustadt Courtesy Homepolish  Dear Fashion Friends, Do you know Rachel Zoe’s glamorous lifestyle site The Zoe Report? Well recently Homepolish teamed up with them to do a gorgeous makeover for an even more gorgeous lady and her double gorgeous husband and baby (designed by me!). Megan (pictured with me above) is one of my favorite clients ever because she was so sweet and easy to work with. You can see the full write up of her home makeover, along with one funny joke and like seven lame ones, at Homepolish Magazine. Love, Orlando FULL STORY HERE>>>

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How To Make Handpainted Wrapping Paper That’s So Simple It’s Stupid

Photographs by Sean Gin Courtesy Homepolish Dear Rapper T.I., I don’t know you, or want to know you, but I do know that you love rapping. And you know what? So do I! In honor of my love for rapping, I made my own wrapping paper this year. And so can you! All you’ll need is paper, paint, scissors, and courage. Also, you’ll need to make sure you have an outfit that color coordinates with your paint colors. Hurry, T.I., those presents aren’t going to wrap themselves! To read the full DIY of how to make wrapping paper that will knock…

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Williams-Sonoma Grand Opening

Photographs by Sean Gin Dear Chuck Williams, I grew up being dragged to Williams-Sonoma constantly by my mother, who has an addiction to buying kitchen gadgets and beautiful linens. And tea towels. And basically everything else your company sells. I love going into Williams-Sonoma stores now, because it reminds me of all the time I spent there with my mom, learning things like what a lemon-zester was, and why we needed one. Thus, you can imagine my delight when Williams-Sonoma invited me to visit their freshly-opened store at South Coast Plaza, which is distinct amongst Williams-Sonoma stores because it features the Williams-Sonoma…

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D.I.WHY? How To Make A Wreath That No One Else Has

 Photographs by Sean Gin Courtesy Homepolish Dear Holiday Crafters, Look at me. Holding that wreath like a psychopath. Do you want your own wreath that you can hold like a psychopath? If so, check out my glamourous how-to on Homepolish Magazine. In it, I’ll give you step by step instructions on how to make this wreath all on your own, as well as a few tips on how to live a life filled with erotic delight. Just kidding. What are you waiting for? Hurry on over to Homepolish Magazine and check it out! Love, Orlando FULL STORY HERE>>>

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10 Ways to Make Your Holidays Sparkle Without Looking Like The Huge Nerd You Really Are

Photograph by Daniel Collopy Dear Reader, It’s very important that you drop everything, even if it’s a baby, and read my latest post on Homepolish Magazine entitled 10 Ways to Make Your Holidays Sparkle Without Looking Like The Huge Nerd You Really Are. It features all the glamour and glitz of my Crate and Barrel holiday makeover WITH EVEN MORE TIPS on how to make your house horrendously happy for the holidays. Hurry! Orlando FULL STORY THIS WAY>>>

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Literally No One Is An Insider

Photograph by Andy Fillmore via Filth & Wisdom Dear Lea Michele, A few years ago, I experienced for the first time being seen as an insider of sorts. I’d written a post about body image, which somehow aligned me with a group of body-neurotic, waxy Weho boys (for you non-gays out there, basically a “Weho boy” is a mean popular Gay who is accepted by all the other mean popular Gays, at least as I understand it). A lot of the comments on that post seemed to be coming from the perspective of people who felt alienated from the mainstream body-obsession…

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Crate & Barrel + Hommemaker Holiday

Photographs by Daniel Collopy Dear Reader, Christmas. It’s always been a big deal for me. Maybe because I have always loved making things. Maybe because I grew up in a cabin that looked like a gingerbread house. Maybe because as a child I loved stories about weirdos who made their own Christmas decorations. My favorite was A Christmas Memory, the Truman Capote story about how his whole family hated him and how he and his best friend made Christmas tree decorations out of candy wrappers. Moral of the story: with a little creativity and imagination, you can make your Christmas celebration truly magical….

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A Christmas Miracle Came Early And Is Going To Make Your Eyeballz Explode Violently From Their Sockets

Photograph by Daniel Collopy You Guys, Something is happening on Wednesday that is going to make your eyeballz explode out of your head, bounce off the wall across the room, and then plop back into your eye sockets just so that you can look at what’s happening on the internet. What’s happening on the internet is the Crate and Barrel has chosen me to be one of their inaugural Holiday Bloggers this year. For the next few weeks, Crate and Barrel will be featuring the amazing work of seven of the internet’s most creative writers, who will be covering everything from cooking, to crafting, to…

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Watch This Infomercial for Meth!

Dear Potential Meth Addicts, PUT THAT METH DOWN AND WATCH THIS VIDEO! A few weeks ago I found myself watching one of those home shopping network channels at a hotel in Carmel and I couldn’t get over how ridiculous it was. It was October 30th and they were selling these crazy snow globe lamp things that were literally the ugliest, worst thing I’ve ever seen. But maybe not quite as bad a meth, which my friends Jeffery Self and Drew Droege make a case for in this parody of an infomercial. It’s actually a PSA for NOT doing meth, but…

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Fresh Feelings For Your Eyeballz: Fall Colors In Yosemite

Photography by Orlando Soria and Your Mom. Just Kidding His Mom. Dear Autumn, There’s something about you that makes me miss Yosemite. Growing up, fall was my favorite time of the year because it meant all the obnoxious summertime tourists were finally gone. Finally, I could ride my bike to the store without having to weave through sweaty tourists in American flag t-shirts eating ice cream and feeding Doritos to the animals. Fall is a magical time in Yosemite for other, more obvious reasons. Mainly that it’s disgustingly gorgeous and so romantic you’ll want to gouge your eyes out with a pumpkin…

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New Simply Framed Graphic Art by Erika Gragg

Photographs by Sean Gin Courtesy Homepolish Dear Art Oglers, One time, when Erika Gragg and I were freshman at Cornell, I called her a Barbie in painting class. She never forgave me. She brings it up a lot. We’ll be just eating lunch somewhere random and she’ll be like “REMEMBER WHEN YOU CALLED ME A BARBIE?” And then everyone in the restaurant will drop their forks and glare at me, knowing what a horrible person I am for calling people Barbies just because they have blond hair and laugh a lot. Since being traumatized by me in college, Erika has gone on to create…

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That One Time A New Living Room Gave Me A New Reason To Live

Photographs by Sean Gin Courtesy HomepolishDear People Who Are Excited For Halloween To Be Over So We Can Start Writing Letters To Santa Asking For Stuff, Christmas came early for me this year because LOOK AT MY NEW(ish) living room! In celebration of the fun updates I made in my home, I wrote a potpourri of posts, the first, most riveting one for Emily Henderson’s lovely site and the second, more sobering and hard-hitting one for Homepolish Magazine. Highlights include: This luscious new coffee table from Crate & Barrel. This saucy side table, also from Crate & Barrel. AND THIS MESMERIZING…

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Homepolish Highlights: Tropicaltimez in Noa Santos’ Living Room

Photos by Claire Esparros Courtesy Homepolish Dear Design Dorks, As you know I’m the West Coast Creative Director of Homepolish. Thus, I’ve decided to start a series highlighting my favorite projects from the company’s roster of crazy talented designers. Who better to start with than Noa Santos, the designer who started it all with his cofounder Will Nathan just a few years ago. As soon as I saw the banana palm tree in the corner, I knew Noa and his boyfriend Ross had great style. Before that I was like “That’s a lot of asymmetrical ironic flowing sweaters and male jeggings…

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D.I.Why? If You Knew How Simple It Was To Make A Bench Your Head Would Explode

Photographs by Sean Gin Courtesy Homepolish Dear Diary, I recently designed Kelly Oxford’s house (remember?) and we needed a bench for her dining room. So I enlisted the help of Kelly and a highly-skilled child laborer (who happens to be her son) and we made a bench together. Oh Diary, I hope you’ll believe me when I tell you it was so fun and easy, anyone could do it! Even you, Diary, and you’re just a dumb old book filled with illegible scribbling about guys and shopping! Here are some preview shots of what we did: What, Diary? You want to…

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From Garbage to Glamorous: Making Dreams Come True for One Special Bookcase

Dear Non-Garbage Person, The other day I was in St Vincent De Paul Thrift Store near Downtown LA and I came across a deal too good to pass up. They were selling these lovely little library bookcases for $15. Naturally, I was all “Oh my god I need one!” Which I say sometimes. Usually when I totally do not need one. If you’ve ever been in St Vincent’s you know how dirty and disgusting it is. It’s like jumping into a giant landfill. But filthier. But you find gems there from time to time so it’s worth it. The hunt is half…

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Whut Glamour: The New Man Repeller Office

Photographs by Claire Esparros Courtesy Homepolish Dear Leandra Medine, I love your site Man Repeller, which is basically a blog about how ladies should wear what they want regardless of what guys think because guys are garbageholes. Just kidding I put in the part about guys being garbageholes. But they are. AM I RIGHT LADIEZ? In other news, I love that you love overalls, because I’ve been obsessed with them ever since I read “East of Eden.” Homepolish has designed not one, but two of the Man Repeller offices, and the latest space is so delicious I wish I were a giant so I could…

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Further Proof That Paint is Magic

Photographs Courtesy Kyung Woo Han Dear Pool Party People, I came across the work of Kyung Woo Han recently while I was wandering aimlessly around the internet and I just had to share it even though he made this piece in 2009 which is like 500 years ago in internet years. Basically, he used wall paint to transform an indoor space into an optical illusion swimming pool (i.e. my dream home). As you probably know, I am a huge fan of transform a space using just paint and aqua is my favorite color, so this is basically the most important thing I’ve ever seen…

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The Hommemaker Guide to Getting Over It

Dear Complete Stranger on the Internet, The year 2013 was not my year. If you’ve been reading my blog a while, you know what happened. A relationship ended, one that was very important to me and a first in a lot of ways. My career was in flux as I stopped working daily with Emily Henderson to break out on my own, a decision that was difficult for both of us as we were (are) best friends and working together every day felt like being with family.  My financial situation was a roller coaster, dire, and stress-filled. Basically I got…

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Get In My Eyeballz: Gray Malin’s ‘Dream’ Series

Photographs Courtesy Gray Malin Dear Gray Malin, You may remember yourself from the glamorous One Kings Lane home makeover we did together months ago, where we first met and became friends. I remember you from all the wonderful photos you take that are like candy for my eyeballz. Your newest body of work is an extremely fun project called The Dream Series. It’s a surreal, beautiful series featuring hypercolor sheep in the gorgeous Australian countryside, waddling around, being themselves, not caring what anyone else thinks. Don’t be scared, the dyes Gray used are totally harmless, vegetable-based pigments that wash off with water….

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Goop + Homepolish Team Up to Decorate a Sunny West Hollywood Bachelor Pad

Photographs by Zeke Ruelas Courtesy Homepolish Dear Client Kevin, Did you see the Homepolish miracle that occurred in your apartment after I waddled in and waved my arms all over the place like a deranged octopus? I hope so, because you live there. If not, you have plenty of options. First, you can check out the full story on Goop to see how I took your apartment from “OH NO” to “OOH LA LA” in just a matter of moments. Once you’ve done that, head on over to Hompolish Magazine for more coverage. Then, continue drinking with me like we…

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My Friends Made This So Now You Have To Watch It: ‘Paragon School for Girls’

Film Stills Courtesty Paragon School for Girls Dear Anyone Who Is Listening, Hello? Are you still there? It’s me, Orlando, calling you from inside the “Internet.” Anyway, a long time ago my friend Jim showed me this web series he was developing called Paragon School for Girls and I was like YOU HAVE TO PUT THIS ON THE INTERNET IMMEDIATELY. So he finally did. JUST IN TIME FOR HALLOWEEN! And now you can enjoy it. Have you ever fantasized about living in a dollhouse? If so, you’re going to be obsessed wit this. If not, there is something wrong with…

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