My Daddy Mac Needs a Caddy

Dear New MacBook Pro,

You are so expensive and fragile. As someone who is also expensive and fragile, I know the feeling. We need special protection. We like to be wrapped in beautiful things that shelter us from the harsh world around us. This is why I am seeking the best laptop case in the world. I want something that is both stylish and allows me to throw my computer across the room without breaking it. Thus far, I have no case and have been clutching my computer to my chest as I navigate the cruel homosexual world that I live in (imagine me, all alone, clasping my computer as I wait in line at Tender Greens amongst ferocious Gays clamoring violently for their delectable salads. Fear.). Below are some cases I’m looking at.

Felt Briefcase MacBook Sleeve from Etsy, $34

This one reminds me of a warm wool sweater on a cold college day. And let’s face it, what day in college wasn’t cold?

Hardback Leather Case from BookBook, $79

I’ve loved this one for a while. I know it’s kind of gimmicky but I love books so much and miss carrying them around. actually, let’s be real. I miss reading them, too. Now all I do is look at them quizzically and wonder why they don’t scroll when I run my finger down the page. Why aren’t any of the words clickable? I’m so scared and confused.

Protective Sleeve from InCase, $49.95

This one is really basic/boring, but that little pop of baby blue makes me happy. It doesn’t take much to make me happy.

Vinyl Laptop Bag from American Apparel, $34

I like this one because it goes along with my whole Japanese Rapper persona. What, you say? You didn’t know about my Japanese Rapper persona? You have, like, so much to learn.

Trompe L’Oeil Laptop Case from Urban Outfitters, $29

I like this one because it reminds me of being in art school. Which reminds me of being sullen and aloof. Which reminds me of how cool I used to be. Which fills me with anxiety for being such a dork now.

Grey Wool and Brown Leather MacBook Sleeve from Etsy, $79

The combination of the wool and the leather straps is doing a delightful 1940s American Schoolhouse thing for me. It works.

Tan Leather Laptop Bag from Topman, $95

Doesn’t this leather look soft and inviting? Like you want to rub it all over your supple cheeks? Even though it’s made out of the skin of a dead sentient being, bred solely for the purpose of being eaten and/or skinned? I still want it. I hate myself.

Wooden Laptop Case with Leather Lining from Rainer Spehl, $200

This is the heavy-duty case I’m looking for. While all the other ones are soft and pillowy (like my belly after the holidays), this one is hard and strong (like my boyfriend’s irritatingly perfect abs). I can imagine dropping this off a building, my computer emerging without a scratch.

Pendleton Laptop Case from Etsy, $55

I love this geometric pattern. This is the perfect case for someone who needs to bring their laptop along to Coachella or Cinespia.

Grab Laptop Folio from Hard Graft, $235

How cool is that hand strap? If I had this one I’d take it everywhere with me, just to feel cool for having such a beautiful laptop case. Also, if I had this I’d be homeless because, damn Gina! That’s expensive. But necessary? I don’t know what to do!

Which one do you think I should buy?

Love,
Orlando

6 thoughts on “My Daddy Mac Needs a Caddy

  1. Get the one that looks like a book! Four reasons:
    1. It looks like a book, DUH! How cool is that?
    2. It’s cheap enough that if you get tired of reason #1, you can replace it without feeling like a schmuck.
    3. It has more protection that the other soft-sided cases you were looking at, without being crazy expensive like the wood one.
    4. Maybe if you forget it somewhere, no one will take it because they think it’s a book.

  2. I have a 15″ Mac Book Pro, it’s a bit weighty (I know, first world problem…I sound like a douche). I bought this sleeve http://www.amazon.com/Incase-CL57524-Neoprene-Commuter-Sleeve/dp/B00434WY9O

    pros
    – it has handles, you might think you don’t need them but they are very helpful when you’re trotting around town (the handles tuck into the pockets on the top to keep things looking tidy once you’re sitchiated)
    – it has a removable strap to sling cross body. Again super useful when your arms are occupied with things like a cappuccino AND a morning bun.
    – it has a slim side zippered pocket to stash one magazine, some paper, pencil, phone, etc.
    -it’s well padded with a super soft faux fur type lining
    – the smooth neoprene fabric hasn’t yet pilled up the hip area on my sweaters.
    – I found it for $19.99 at Marshall’s (surprisingly, where a good amount of tech accessories are on deep discount…sleeves, adapters, cases, earbuds, etc.)

    cons
    – it is a very snug fit for my MBP, a Mac Book Air would probably be easier to fit. The faux fur lining is allllmost too thick. So each time I use it there is some wiggling involved but I guess I’m willing to deal with it.

    I seriously considered get the faux book laptop sleeve in red when I first started looking.

  3. I love the Grey Wool and Brown Leather MacBook Sleeve. Super sleek and won’t break the bank either. Do it to it.

  4. Nice to see a lot of the laptop cases I’ve been eyeing are on your list! Personally I like the idea of using my laptop without taking it out of the case (as opposed to a sleeve) so the gimmicky book one I find the most functional. Also, being from New York, I avoid anything that screams, “HEY LOOK AT ME! I OBVIOUSLY DON’T WORK OUT & YOU CAN EASILY WRESTLE THIS $2000 OUT OF MY TINY HANDS!” so I’m not a fan of laptop bags. I like backpacks, or as people that probably read Monocle & the Selby call them–rucksacks. I have a simple, very covert canvas backpack that leaves and sexy sweat mark on my back when I use it in the summer. I plan to write on it with a white out pen and pretend I’m in middle school again.

  5. Dear Orlando, (I’ve read more than one post!)

    I agree with you on the last option. That is very cool, mostly because of the ingenious handle that allows one to carry it so comfortably. You’d be able to point out directions, run and catch the bus, and at the last second hold a door open with your elbow (making you a stylish gentleman).

    It is expensive, which hopefully means it’s quality, which then means you wouldn’t have to buy another one. That means you’d have it for a long time, which means the coolness factor would increase every year by a factor of at least 5 and then after 15 years it’d be infinitely cool. I would suggest a leather conditioner. This is a good one: http://www.passier.com/en/accessories/care/

    I also like the Grey Wool and Brown Leather MacBook Sleeve from Etsy.

    I am enjoying your website! My friend introduced it to me today!

    Cheers,

    Lee

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