Around The Apartment: Everything Must Go!

Dear Diary,

Have you wondered where I’ve been and what I’ve been up to? Me too. Most of my time has gone to decorating houses with Emily Henderson, pulling my hair out over taxes, and daydreaming about my boyfriend running on the beach in a Speedo. We have a big West Elm photo/video shoot coming up in our apartment, so things are changing daily here. As you may remember my apartment was shot for Refinery29 a few months ago. Here are a few of those shots:

Spring is a time for refreshing change, so I bought a few new books for the coffee table, including the glamorous Luc Tuymans book below. I also bought a book of Fabian Baron photographs called Liquid Light and it may be my favorite thing in the world. I love his images.

I sold my lady chairs. Here is what they looked like in case you forgot:

As soon as I sold the ladychairs I regretted it. They were so comfy and they provided the perfect counterbalance to my hypermasculine apartment. (Sigh, if only if I were as straight-acting as my apartment. [Just kidding I don’t want to be straight-acting {Yes I do}]). My boyfriend recently found this beauty on Craigslist, which we bought for $500:

It’s Milo Baughman. Totally glamorous. Only drawback is that barf-inducing color. The worst thing about the color is that my boyfriend likes it. He loves browns, reds, and earthtones. Which is funny because those are my three least favorite things in the world. I hate them more than I hate child hunger. Ew I just said that. (No I didn’t). The typical conversation about how to reupholster the Milo chair goes something like this:

Me: “Blue.”
Boyfriend: “Brown.”
Me: “Grey.”
Boyfriend: “Brown.”
Me: “White.”
Boyfriend: “Brown.”
Me: “Gold.”
Boyfriend: “Dark Brown.”

That lasts for three hours until we get tired and watch Terminator 2: Judgement Day on Netflix.

A few months ago, long before we purchased the Milo chair (which still needs a partner by the way, I want a pair), I saw this guy at the flea market for $400/pair:

I showed him to my boyfriend and Emily, and both of them told me I was crazy for liking them. Cut to a month later when I saw them at Nickey Kehoe for $2650. Which obviously made me want them more. I hate everything and I’m never listening to anyone about anything ever again. Let this be a lesson to all of you to follow your hearts. Especially when your heart tells you to buy ugly 80s chairs at the flea market.

Luckily, after I missed out on those awesome 80s leather chairs at the flea market, I found a pair of delightful mid-century chairs at TL Gurley in Pasadena, a score for $150/pair.

I snagged this rug from Craigslist, but it was too long for my hallway (sad). At least it was only $150. Let this be a lesson to all of us to measure, and measure, and measure. And then measure again. Nevermind, don’t do that. Measuring is boring.

Working for someone who is obsessed with flowers has its perks. Emily sent me home with these beautiful Magnolias the other day:

Speaking of Magnolias, remember that scene in Magnolia where Julianne Moore freaks out because the pharmacist wont give her drugs? I love that part. Anyway, I moved this Japanese screen into the bedroom because we needed some warmth in there. Because that room is so sunny, it really glows in there. Sometimes I have a hard time going to work because I just want to gaze at it all day. Lately, I’ve been going to work out early in the morning while my boyfriend is still asleep. I’ll stand there looking at him, then at the Japanese screen. Trying to figure out which one I would save in a fire. I’m pretty sure I’d save the screen. I mean my boyfriend. I mean the screen. Okay fine my boyfriend (and the screen).

I’m nixing the lamps in my bedroom (or my living room I can’t decide) and switching them out for these rad sconces from OneFortyThree lighting. I’m obsessed with this company right now. They have tons of pretty, affordable, simple lighting that is unique and well-made. The pair I got were $145 each, which is a great price for new lighting.

Morgan (of The Brick House) is also making awesome/simple lighting for her new brand Camp. I saw some options I’m considering at Shopclass recently (sidenote: Shopclass is my new favorite place. In the world).

I love this geode I saw at Shopclass. It’s not for sale. Yet. But maybe they’ll sell it to me if I offer them enough of my millions (I have too many of them lying around anyway).

I found this dude at The Huntington Collection for $45. He’s so sad, but he makes me so happy.

I love my old pub chairs, but, gurl, they be creeky that they sound like they are going to break every time I sit down. Which any of you FFK’s (Former Fat Kids) out there will know is a legitimate reason to get rid of a piece of furniture. Thus, I’ve decided it’s time to say goodbye.

I’m opting for these beauties from West Elm ($239/set 4).

The reason I loved them so much is that they remind me of these beautiful Calder sculptures:

In the future I aspire for all my furniture to look like sculptures by famous artists.

Another thing that I got rid of was my sleeper sofa. Remember that guy?

I loved that sofa. I designed it myself and the color was a dream come true. The only issue with it is that it wasn’t big enough for two full-grown men to lay on together. And because snuggling and watching “New Girl” is so very important to me, I decided it was time to say goodbye to my beloved sofa. In its place, I got a sofa with a similar look, but deeper and more accommodating to prolonged cuddling.

The sofa is the Dunham Sofa from West Elm. Like Lena Dunham, for whom the sofa is named (not really), my new sofa is comfortable, outspoken, and a little bit edgy. I know I sound like a West Elm commercial right now, but I kind of want everything in there right now. I love my sofa so much I’m trying to force my parents to buy the same one but they’re all “I want a sofa with round arms because round arms are like pillows” and I’m like “Gross. Buy a pillow.” The version of the Dunham sofa I got was $1499. I will be writing more about it on Emily’s blog (including full details on color, etc) next month.

Finally, I found this old sailor dude at Shopclass (I told you, it’s my favorite store now). He kind of reminds me of what I look like on a typical summer Monday. After drinking by the pool all weekend without moisturizing. Oh summer, how I love thee and dread thy impending arrival…

Oh, and the old man painting was $25. Everything at Shopclass is a total bargain.

So, that’s where I’ve been the last month. Mainly just buying stuff. Like a real American. What have you been doing?

Love,
Orlando

PS: Full disclosure, aspects of this post are sponsored by the lovely people at West Elm, including the sofa and the dining chairs  (which were both provided gratis).

PSS: Please check back soon for the full story on my apartment’s extreme makeover, featuring professional photographs, more furniture porn, and shout outs to Emily Henderson, who made the whole thing possible.